I'm here

I haven't been doing good lately. I've been having a lot of trouble with my anxiety. Recently I've started doing at least one thing each day that pushes me out of my comfort zone no matter how small that thing may be and I've been finding that it is helping a bit.

It's been a long time, not sure exactly how long that I've actually turned on my computer, it may sound strange but i have been shying away from turning on my computer because I've been feeling that i couldn't handle contact with other people, which lets me know that it is not just my anxiety, but also my depression which has been limiting what i feel i am able to do.

I'm expecting my sister to be getting here for a short visit in just under two hours. I spoke to her last night and she said she would be here, so unless an emergency crops up i will be having a visit which will help me a bit.

I've had the feeling lately that my neighbors in my apartment building that i was friendly with are not really wanting to have much to do with me lately. I don't know if they're just respecting the fact of what I'm going through and giving me the space i need to get back to feeling myself. Or is there something going on? Is there some reason that i feel they're hurrying to get away from me when i want to talk to them? I have no idea what is going on but i am hoping that i haven't lost the friendship of those neighbors that i liked to spend time with. See it's been a couple of months that I've been trying to get past this anxiety/depression thing that I'm having trouble with right now.

I haven't been going to Church either while this has been going on and I'm hoping that my friends there will receive me well when i do go back. I'm hoping to get to go to Church this weekend, as long as I'm feeling OK on Sunday then i definitely want to go to Church. There are so many people there that are always nice to me and i feel that is the perfect place to get myself used to going out and interacting with people again.
Hugs,
Dixtra
XOXO